i blame the rain

thank goodness we have a holiday tomorrow.

i know, i know

i'm not a great blogger. the posts are becoming increasingly less frequent and interesting.

you just have to accept that.

but i feel you might take pity on me for some of the following reasons:

• i am working full time these days. and it is awful. luckily, i have a very attractive live-in nanny. (i don't want to get too descriptive, but i think he might kiss me if i play my cards right.)
• penelope is getting over her first sickness. this is terrible in itself, but even worse knowing that jesse is the one taking care of her all day while i am at work. at the height of the illness, i came home at lunch for some hardcore snuggling. she cried until i gave her back to jesse. i might have cried a little on my way back to work.
• we are moving to boise next weekend (hooray!)
• we are moving next weekend (ugh... packing...)
• i am throwing a bridal shower for the sweetest libby in the whole wide world (hooray!)
• i am throwing a bridal shower the same weekend i am moving (ugh... what was i thinking? last time i checked, i do make my own social schedule.)
• i am changing my work location (see boise note) and cutting my hours, but still retaining about the same work load. i will be overwhelmed, but now i will only overwhelmed for five hours a day at work, and the rest of the time at home with the little one.

isn't this just how life seems to go? busy, busy, busy. i am seriously craving a nap. and some downtime with emily dickinson.

p.s. did i mention it has been snowing here? SNOWING in late may. at this rate, this little girl is going to outgrow all her summer clothes before the sun comes out.

mothering through the generations

i am learning how to be a mother. unfortunately, there was no specialized training to prepare me for this venture (though aunthood certainly helped). this is unfortunate, because sometimes i think i make a better student than functioning adult.

yesterday, i was reminded that i come from a line of wonderful mothers. and not to be too biased, but i really think i am learning from the best.

(can you believe that my sweet mother is my age in this picture? what lovely young beauty! and how precious is little cameron?!?)

and sure, i may have accidentally dropped the remote on my baby's head while nursing her. or maybe i did call her a poo face angrily and (kind of ) meant it because she wouldn't stop crying. the good news is that while i am learning on the job, i get to learn on the best.

happy mothers' day to mothers (and aunts and sisters and friends and inspiring women) past, present and future.

captain's log

sad today that the baby is officially a size bigger than she used to be. car seat straps, jacket, jammies, everything.

even sadder that i am still at least two sizes bigger than i used to be.

on a much more important matter, i am finding at least twice as much snuggle time in my daily life.

it's totally worth it.

evensong

we have started whispering all the time to each other when the baby is asleep. even when we are in a completely different part of the house where she couldn't possibly hear us.

i am even typing this quietly.

you see, when your two-month-old daughter no longer fits into her 0-3 months clothes and is in the 96th percentile weight range for her age, you fear what happens when you wake a sleeping (though admittedly adorable) mini-giant.

(no, honey, this isn't the same photo i promised you i wouldn't put on my blog. she looks really terrifying/hilarious in that one, but i picked this much more tame version. i promise.)

will the real penelope please spit up?

let's clear the air

there has been some recent speculation that this lovely lady

(penelope A)

was named after this lovely lady.

(penelope B)

and while i can't deny that i utterly adore both of them, the fact is that they are both named after this lovely lady.

(penelope classic)

think about it -- she faithfully waits for odysseus AND she's a pretty awesome weaver. in fact, penelope means weaver (according to some weird baby name sites, it also means duck. which i guess is also awesome).

the weaving thing might seem silly, but did you know that there is a long, long literary history behind the use of weaving as a metaphor for poetry? it's true. i actually wrote a 20-page essay about it in graduate school (wordsworth was quite the fan of this metaphor). in short, the weaver is the first poet -- weaving individual strands/words together to craft a beautiful final product.

and my own little penelope is the result of weaving together so many of my own tender life experiences. she is the product of so many prayers, hopes, agonizing workouts to keep my blood sugars in line, tears, negative pregnancy tests, tears, prayers, all-night talks with jesse, and (did i mention this already?) more prayers. and she's more beautiful and precious than i could have ever imagined. and i can't wait to see how her individual life experiences weave together and create a beautiful woman.

now that we have cleared that up, onto some adorable displays of babiness from the littlest penelope (mostly so i have something to watch at work tomorrow when i am missing her terribly.)

and p.s. my first day back at work today was fine, as any sane person would have guessed. the crazy woman writing this post is ridiculously relieved.

and p.p.s. how awesome was last week's episode of LOST? i have been dying to say something on here about it. let's just say that penelope and desmond melt my heart. and i can't wait for tonight's episode.

you'll be relieved to know

my body has been slowly bouncing back. don't get me wrong, i still have quite a bit of pregnancy weight to go, but my feet and face have returned to normal size. i'm quite glad as i had nearly forgotten what my ankles looked like.

the easter bunny did, in fact, visit our home. sure, we don't have space for anything in this house, but he somehow managed to squeeze his fluffy behind into the house to deliver penny's goods. however, the easter bunny was much lazier this year than i remember, because he brought the whole family's goodies in one basket. (i guess he didn't want to go digging through boxes in the basement to find everyone's basket...)

but don't worry. the little one was quite content to just play with her own bunny on easter morning.

we even got a photo of penelope enjoying easter ham in her easter dress with her easter papa.

should you need to take nail polish out of your mom's carpet after you indulge yourself with a home-grown pedicure during general conference, i have the answer: shaving cream. i kid you not. it worked like a charm. however, perhaps the best way to ensure your carpets are nail-polish-free is to check the lid of the bottle before moving it, thereby preventing spills in the first place. you know, the best defense is a good offense.

(see above foot photo for reference on the color of aforementioned nail polish)

penelope was blessed in church last week. i have tried to write about seven posts about that wonderful experience, but they have all been a bit too personal/emotional. i mean, with a little face and spirit this beautiful in our home, can you really blame me for getting choked up? so, i will try to keep the wonderful feelings from that day in a more private place and share a photo instead.

i am going back to work in eight days. if you are, in fact, relieved to know this, please let me know how we can somehow swap our emotions. at first, i was thrilled to have something to do every day and a reason to shower regularly. but now that i have considered the fact that penelope will be going somewhere else, and i will be missing every detail of her life, i am terrified and anxiety-ridden at the thought of work. how does one cope with this?

until i figure it out, i'll be relieved that i have such a blissful life for today.